Do Marriage From a Place of Love

That seems like a no-brainer, but in talking to many married couples, I hear many of them doing marriage from other places. I am reminded of the first disagreement in our marriage and how I acted. It was within the first 30 days of being Mr. and Mrs. Scott. I said something very harsh to Terry because I was mad and wanted him to know it. It didn’t describe how I felt about our marriage, but it was definitely how I felt at that very moment.  I quickly saw the destruction that this could cause, so I quickly repented to God and Terry. They both quickly forgave me.  Note: Quick forgiveness is huge in marriage.

From that incident, I understood I loved Terry and loved being married to him but just needed to act like it... all the time. I needed to do marriage from a place of love. So, how does love act? It acts like 1 Corinthians 13, known as the love chapter. I strongly urge you to personalize the behaviors in verses 4 - 8 as instructions for your marriage and do them. Terry and I are patient with each other, gentle in dealing with each other; do not behave rudely toward each other (in private or in public); and we think no evil of each other (by seeing each other’s greatness), just to name a few behaviors from this amazing chapter. By doing these things your marriage will not fail because like verse 8 reads, love never fails. 

Although the love chapter is how Terry and I are in our marriage, we also realize that this is an area in which we will forever continue to grow, even as we approach 39 years of marriage. I cannot fathom what this marriage would look like if I had taken that first disagreement and frustration, planted it in the marriage like a stake, and decided that this is the place from which our marriage will proceed. What if Terry did the same thing? The honeymoon would definitely be over, even if the marriage continued. Doing marriage from love strengthens and makes all the other places that encompass a marriage beautiful. Although we are completely aware of each other’s flaws, we still pray together, laugh together, have fun together, lift each other up and our marriage with our words together, walk through tough times together, and continue to grow in the Lord together. How? By doing marriage from a place of love together.